As with the Roman Empire once it became bloated and under increasing pressure from rampaging barbarians, the Fish have decided to split their resources and hold two Fishmas parties - one in East Sussex, and one in West Sussex.
As the Romans divided their empire between Rome in the West and Byzantium in the East, the Fish will play in the amazingly similar surroundings to those fabled cities - Brighton and Shoreham.
The extravaganzas will differ regarding the line-up too.
On Saturday, December 20, the Annual Fishmas Party (East) will feature only Fatty Fish and Chesty as an acoustic double act.
The Railway Bell, right near Brighton Station, has just been served with a noise abatement notice, so the full band is out of the question.
Originally, we proposed to have only three musos on stage at one time, in a sort of kaleidoscope of catastrophic crap. Now there will be only two of us with the hope that Chesty is feeling better.
However, many people tell us that they prefer the old traditional duo rather than the full-on experience. So this is for them, with all the old stuff in a singalong fudge-packed evening.
The Annual Fishmas Party (West) is on the following Saturday (Dec 27) at the Duke of Wellington in Shoreham.
This will be the full, no-holds barred fabulous five-piece with new songs interspersed with all your favourites and the best beer for miles and miles.
Admission is free at both shows. The Fishmas East must end at 11pm so we don't upset the already angry neighbours.
Come on down and support your local drunks.